"Joseph and Mary’s relationship"

God’s design for marriage and the unique circumstances surrounding Joseph and Mary’s relationship. While their situation was extraordinary due to God’s redemptive plan for Jesus, it still aligns with God's eternal principles of marriage.

Let’s dive into what makes a couple husband and wife in God’s eyes, especially in the case of Joseph and Mary, even without a recorded wedding or sexual union.

1. Marriage as a Covenant Before God
Biblically, marriage is defined as a covenant—a solemn agreement made before God, involving commitment, faithfulness, and mutual responsibility. It is not solely dependent on physical union.

Malachi 2:14: "The LORD hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth... she is thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant."
Joseph and Mary entered into a marital covenant when Joseph took Mary into his home as his wife (Matthew 1:24). This covenant was sealed by their mutual obedience to God’s will and their acceptance of the roles He assigned to them.
2. Betrothal in Jewish Custom
Joseph and Mary’s situation must be understood in the context of Jewish betrothal practices of their time:

Betrothal was legally binding: In Jewish culture, a betrothal (or "kiddushin") was more binding than modern-day engagements. The man and woman were considered husband and wife under the law, even though they had not yet come together physically (Deuteronomy 22:23-24).
Formal consummation came later: The husband would take the wife into his home after a period of preparation, at which point the marriage was typically consummated.
In Matthew 1:18-25, we see that Joseph and Mary were betrothed, but Joseph chose to take her as his wife without dissolving the engagement—even after learning she was pregnant. This fulfilled the legal and spiritual requirements for their marriage.

3. Joseph’s Role as Husband
Joseph became Mary’s husband by:

Accepting responsibility for her and her unborn child (Matthew 1:24-25).
Providing for and protecting her in accordance with God’s instructions.
Uniting with her spiritually and missionally to fulfill God’s plan for raising Jesus.
Their marital union was not about fulfilling personal desires but about fulfilling God’s purpose.

4. Oneness Without Physical Union
The Bible emphasizes that oneness in marriage is more than physical intimacy:

Genesis 2:24: "They shall be one flesh" refers to both physical and spiritual unity, but the latter is the foundation of marriage. Joseph and Mary were "one" in their commitment to God’s will, their covenantal relationship, and their shared mission to raise the Messiah.
Sexual intimacy is important in most marriages (1 Corinthians 7:3-5), but it is not the sole requirement for a valid marriage. In Joseph and Mary’s case, God called them to a unique purpose that did not require sexual union.
5. God’s Authority in Declaring Them Husband and Wife
God’s direct intervention in Joseph and Mary’s relationship establishes their marriage:

Matthew 1:20-21: The angel told Joseph not to fear taking Mary as his wife, confirming that their union was part of God’s divine plan.
By obeying God’s command, Joseph legally and spiritually took Mary as his wife, even though their marriage was unconventional by human standards.
Why No Recorded Wedding?
The Bible does not describe a formal wedding ceremony for Joseph and Mary, but this does not invalidate their marriage. Weddings in that time were often family and community events, but the absence of a detailed account highlights the significance of their divine calling over societal norms.

Final Thoughts
Joseph and Mary were husband and wife because:

They entered into a covenantal relationship before God through their betrothal.
Joseph obeyed God’s command to take Mary as his wife, affirming their union.
They fulfilled their divinely ordained roles as parents of Jesus, working together in faith and obedience.

Mary remained a virgin her entire life ?

This debate about whether Mary remained a virgin her entire life or had other children after the birth of Jesus has been a topic of discussion among Christians for centuries, with different perspectives based on interpretations of Scripture.

The Perpetual Virginity View

Belief: Mary remained a virgin for her entire life.
Supporters: This view is held by the Catholic Church, Orthodox Christians, and some Protestant denominations.
Key Points:
The term "brothers" of Jesus in the Bible (e.g., Matthew 13:55-56, Mark 6:3) is argued to mean "close relatives" or "cousins" rather than biological siblings. This interpretation stems from the broader use of the word "adelphoi" (Greek for brothers) in ancient cultures, which could refer to kinship beyond siblings.
Verses like Luke 1:34, where Mary says, "How shall this be, seeing I know not a man?" are taken as a sign of her vow of perpetual virginity.
Early Church fathers, like St. Augustine and St. Jerome, defended the idea that Mary remained a virgin, emphasizing her unique role in God’s plan.

The Non-Perpetual Virginity View

Belief: Mary had other children after Jesus, making her Jesus’ mother but not perpetually a virgin.
Supporters: Many Protestants hold this view.
Key Points:
Biblical References to Jesus’ Siblings: Matthew 13:55-56 explicitly names James, Joses, Simon, and Judas as Jesus’ "brothers" and mentions "sisters." This is taken literally by those who argue Mary had other children.
The phrase in Matthew 1:25: "And [Joseph] knew her not till she had brought forth her firstborn son" implies that Mary and Joseph had normal marital relations after Jesus was born.
They argue that Scripture does not suggest any vow of lifelong virginity, but rather focuses on Mary’s role in bearing the Messiah.
What We Can Agree On
Both sides agree that Mary was a virgin at the time of Jesus' conception and birth, fulfilling the prophecy of Isaiah 7:14: "Behold, a virgin shall conceive, and bear a son, and shall call his name Immanuel."
Mary’s unique role in God’s plan is universally acknowledged and respected among Christians.
Scriptures to Reflect On
Matthew 1:18-25 (The virgin birth of Jesus)
Matthew 12:46-50 (Jesus’ mother and brothers seeking Him)
Luke 1:26-38 (The Annunciation)
Mark 6:3 ("Is not this the carpenter, the son of Mary, the brother of James, and Joses, and of Juda, and Simon?")

The View of Joseph as a Widower

Belief: Joseph was an older man who had been married before his betrothal to Mary. He had children from his first marriage, making them Jesus' step-siblings.
Supporters: This idea was widely held by early Christian writers like Origen, Epiphanius of Salamis, and other Church Fathers.
Key Points:
This perspective harmonizes with the idea of Mary’s perpetual virginity since it explains the presence of Jesus' "brothers" and "sisters" without implying that Mary had other children.
Joseph is often depicted as an older man in early Christian art and writings, which supports the idea that he could have been a widower with children.
This interpretation aligns with the idea that Joseph’s primary role was as a guardian and protector of Mary and Jesus, not as a husband seeking to expand his family.
Scriptural and Traditional Basis
The "Brothers and Sisters" of Jesus: Passages like Matthew 13:55-56 and Mark 6:3 are interpreted as referring to Joseph’s children from a prior marriage rather than children of Mary.
No Mention of Mary’s Other Children: If Mary had other biological children, some argue it would be odd for Jesus, on the cross, to entrust Mary to John’s care (John 19:26-27) instead of one of His supposed brothers.
Protoevangelium of James: An early Christian text (written around the second century) describes Joseph as an elderly widower chosen to be Mary’s guardian. While not part of Scripture, it influenced later Christian traditions.
Criticism of This View
Critics argue that the Bible doesn’t explicitly mention Joseph being married before Mary or having other children. The interpretation is based on tradition rather than clear biblical evidence.
Protestant traditions typically reject the Protoevangelium of James as non-canonical and emphasize a plain reading of Scripture, which suggests Mary could have had children after Jesus.
Summary of Perspectives on Jesus’ Siblings
Biological siblings: Mary and Joseph had other children after Jesus' birth.
Close relatives: The "brothers" and "sisters" were cousins or extended family.
Step-siblings: Joseph had children from a previous marriage.